a very quick update...

At the moment I have no internet connection. That I blame my wonderful man for, because he never did tell me the password after he set up the new wireless… I have tried over and over and over again, to call him tonight. However, someone went for a “nap” after work and I think that this nap has turned in to an all nighter… so no wireless internet for me. Not like it’s a matter of life or death, seeing as we’ve had this wireless for at least a month now and today is the first time I’ve actually went to get online with it. (using my own computer)

Any way, back to where I was going with at the beginning, I have no internet connection, so I have no idea where I left off last… I think it was in june. So I’m going to recap the past two months of july and august. (oh right, forgot to mention that it currently is September 6th 2010)

July- first weekend- can’t remember
2nd weekend- family weekend at grandmas
3rd week- Janelle and Jamie were here
4th weekend- horse retreat with wild deuce
5th weekend- oh wait, I believe that means its august…

August- long weekend- can’t remember, think I just stayed home because paul had got home from working away all of july
2nd weekend- at the farm
3rd week- in Ontario for Rob and Josees’ wedding
4th weekend- Friday pauls gone away to work again but then no, they’re just tricking, they’re going on Monday instead. So we miss out on our planned road trip to Banff and the fireworks… ARGH. More to come on this later…maybe, if I ever get back to it…

Ok…so to start this off to say the least, I am very well accomplished at not following through with things. I keep saying over and over that I need to update more often, but like many others out there, “life” gets in the way. But really that is just an excuse and it would be more accurate to say that I let life get in the way. I take the blame, 100%. In all honesty the only reason I am even writing now is because ONE person gave me a polite little reminder that “hey, there is ONE person in the world who reads this every now and again. So UPDATE please!”

Now I know I’m not one to strive for world happiness, or peace and yada yada yada. Not saying that I’m against the idea, just know that I as one entity can’t make the difference. But what I can do, is make one person happy because I updated my blog and who am I to deny happiness?? thats right, i'm not capable of such things. So Cayley, this is for you. You better be happy now. J if you’re not, well… lie to me and let me think you are anyway. Because as we just established you are my purpose for writing this, and without you, well there goes the purpose, which means adios outlet of meandering thoughts and daft musings.

So Paul has been gone to work for 7 days now. It might as well be 80 by how long ago it feels that he left. I can’t help but wonder why the fact that when you’re together time flies but when you’re apart it seems to drag on forever… It makes me think of when you’re going on a trip and you’re so excited to get there and it takes forever…. And ever and ever. But then on the way home, when it’s the exact same amount of time and you aren’t excited whatsoever to be going home, it seems to take ¼ the amount of time it took going the opposite direction. What does this mean? I don’t know. That’s just what it reminds me of…. And it sucks. :(

Cookies and Starbucks

Today was an interesting day. I had a good 11 hours sleep. Woke up, went in to the office for a little bit, worked out and then came home. All this was done in a normal happy attitude and mood. It was like there was an invisible mood changing field I walked through when I came in the front door. Suddenly life seemed far less cheery and enjoyable. It was much more dark and cloudy with a thunder storm building. More accurately would be it was as if there was a massive black cloud that blanketed as far as the eye could see, one so dark you can only sit and wait for the thunder and lightening to begin. But for some reason it never does. It stays black and moves over and surrounds and finally rains and rains and rains. So it’s gloomy and miserable. And you don’t even get a thunder and lightening show out of it. So disappointing. You feel like a child, (a heck, not even a child, I still get this feeling…) who got a new toy. This isn’t any ordinary toy, no, it’s the coolest and most fun toy there is.Its a rocket you get to launch into the sky over and over. (by the way, there is an iron man rocket that does just this. BEST TOY EVERY!) But you can only play with that toy outside, and mother nature just isn’t cooperating. You have to stay inside because there is a massive dark cloud looming. So mom says you can’t go out. You can’t go play with your new because she doesn’t want you to get electrocuted. However, after waiting and waiting and waiting there is no lightening. There is no thunder. But then it downpours. Forever. How disappointing. You sit staring out the window gloomily and for that short while it seems like life will never get better. That’s how I felt this afternoon. However, I had no reason as to why. It was sunny, it was Sunday, I had absolutely no obligation to be anywhere or do anything. Why did it suck so much??!?!?! So, I dealt with it like I always do. By removing myself from the outside world and curling up in bed with a movie. 2 hours later this didn’t solve my problem. So I went to step two. Starbucks and cookies. I dragged my ass out of the house and went and got a grande skinny soy hazelnut latte and chocolate chip cookies. Needless to say, I am now feeling decent again and I’m even writing. Now whether it was the sunshine, the movement of the short walk there, the getting out of the house or the items themselves, all I can say is … Coffee and cookies work miracles. J

i'm bbbbaaaccckkkk.... again.

So it has been a while since the last entry. Only about 2 months… I’m not even going to make a comment about falling off the wagon other than the fact that I’m a professional. My list of things that I’ve fallen away from is large… abs competition…bootcamp… daily dysfunctions… blog in general… writing… courses… health kicks…exercise… and many many more. It would appear many things are started and never finished and I know I’m not the only one who has that problem. So here I am, sitting in front of the computer once more. Hitting the rusty keyboard keys and stretching my fingers as they slowly pick up speed and fall back into their usually quick and nimble typing ways. Ok, I admit, that may be a little too embellished for the not so graceful pounding of keys that I do.

Back to more important things however, that being that I have now decided I am no longer going to give myself missions such as the examples given above. Kind of like the same idea I have about new years resolutions. Everyday is the right day to make a change or do something different. There is no reason to wait for that one day a year to make a resolution. The only catch being, I am not making resolutions. I am just going to keep working day by day one step at a time to do the things I enjoy and live my life. Without feeling bad that I haven’t blogged in a while, I’m not going to beat myself up because I lost the abs I had worked so hard for, and I will not hold it against me that I have not done all the things I said I would do. This I can accept and will take on because even though I didn’t do the things I said I would, I know I was doing much more fun, adventurous and exciting things. Things that I would have missed out on or not had the pleasure of experiencing if I was exercising as much as I was, writing all the time, and blogging every night.

There. That being said, I make no promises on when this will be updated again. If you’re that interested, just keep checking back. J and if you are that fascinated and do keep checking back, then thank you for being so enthralled with my blog. I really don’t think I’m that interesting. However, you, obviously do, or you’re obviously very bored. Either way, thank you.

Paul

Just because he said not to write about him. Thats like when a horse runs away from you when you go to catch one. Thats a volunteer right there! But now that i've got it going my mind is blanking. Not sure if thats because I have absolutely nothing to write about him, which can't be true. but because I just can't think of it right now... on the spot. Damn it. Will have to get back to this one later...

What the h - e double hockey sticks...????

For the past week, I've been getting brainwave and have had moments where i feel inspired to write a blog post. But haven't had the time or am at an impractical location to do so at the time. So now... when I have the morning off.... I have lots of time to spend catching up on my blog. Can I think of anything? NO. Can I find one tiny bit of inspiration? NO. WHAT THE HELL!?!?!?

And it doesn't even stay directly blog related. I have had so many things i've been thinking I want or need to get done. Now I have a day to do it and I can't find any motivation what so ever, or else i find excuses not to. Go out to work on leather, its too cold. Think about cleanign my jeep, i'd rather not. Catch up on my blog, I can't think of anything to write about. do some scrapbooking, that takes effort. Watch a movie, I don't want to pick one. WHAT THE HELL!?!?!?!?

What is wrong with me? I'm really open to any diagnosis anyone has to offer... other than insanity, because I already know that one! haha

dysfunction of today...

dysfunctions....

back in the saddle again... the blog saddle... guess that would be more like back in the office chair then...

So… it may have been a while since my last post. I am now back in the saddle, back on the wagon… whatever you want to call it. The point is, I’m back! For now… we’ll see how long it takes until I fall off once again… time will tell. Shall I start taking bets? Go ahead and place your wagers. I will now be moonlighting as a bookie.

What has happened since my last post…. Well to start off with, I went to Saskatchewan, got in to some major shenanigans that can only be accomplished in saskatchewan with Weston. Had a nice escape from the hustle and bustle of city and work. To the nice wide open flat space of nothing aka. Saskatchewan. That was fun.

Then… it was easter. Easter was good. Spent an extra day and a half in the city than what was originally planned. I blame it all on work. Yes. It was definitely works fault. There was no other cause for my delay of departure….. …. So what, if I may be in denial. So be it…. Went to rimbey on Saturday, then rocky Saturday night and Sunday. Nice time spent with the family.

The three weeks between easter and now have been spent working, working, working, working, working, and working. Did I mention working!? Saturdays as well. Yippee. Woohoo. How exhilarating.

Oh wait, I almost lied. Did manage to get out to the ranch a few weekends back. Nice whirlwind trip with Paul. And kip and al and joel. Managed to get in a nice beer ride and a bit of relaxation. But not much.

That now brings us to today. Today is…. Well its been ok. Things are looking up. Obviously they must be because I’m back on the blog!